HER RAYS!

I picked up the Rays game at the point where they had bases loaded and no outs.  We all know how that ended, and the night just kept getting better and better.  I’ve now witnessed three of these freaking games in like a years time and you know what gets me?  The Rays are good now.  The DEVIL RAYS sucked and they didn’t put me through this.  WTF!

You know how when you’re young and you did something stupid and you had to face your parents and you expected them to go off but instead they just gave you that disappointed look and the silent treatment and somehow that was so much worse than them yelling and screaming.  Yeah that’s where I’m at with the Rays.  I don’t want to be mad anymore.  I’m just sad and disappointed.

I’m really hoping they get hot again and we can forget all of this silly losing and being no hit and stuff.  I really hope they get to a point that a 1 run lead doesn’t seem insurmountable! 

I honestly don’t know what to say.  I guess I’ll just congratulate Edwin Jackson and state for the record that Brignac needs to be back, in the lineup that is.  Oh and an atta boy to Jeff Niemann. 

This totally disappointed fan is going to bed now muttering all the way “three, three friggan no hit sh*t, f*ck, d*mn.”  Go Rays…

It started off on a sad note when I found out Longo wouldn’t be playing.  Where has that finger been?  You’re right, I don’t want to know.  At least he was replaced by Michael Young, whom I’ve always liked.

Pena was so geeked to be a part of these all-star festivities.  Did you see his face when he was getting his picture taken with the President?  So cute.

What the hell is on Ryan Franklin’s chin?  I bet you could find some nasty left overs in there.

Between Longo’s finger, Franklin’s chin pet, and Lincecum’s hair there was a whole lot of icky going on in this game.

If you believe in announcer jinxes then Roy Halladay was doomed before he took the field.

Crawford had a nice base hit and would have had a stolen base if it wasn’t for that darn Ichiro dude.

Can we have Joe Mauer please?  He’s good.

Glad to see Edwin Jackson doing so well.  Wish he would have done that well for the Rays…

Hmmm Ben Zobrist sure looked like Barty playing short.  Barty’s the best shortstop in the AL right now and Fox couldn’t get his name right?  Good thing he gets so much love around here.

CC aka Superman saves the day!  Way to go Carl!

Is it bad that I thought it was kind of funny that Papelbon almost blew it?  Twice.

Granderson showin off the triple.  If the Rays didn’t have so many great outfielders of their own, I’d be pretty jealous.  Same thing for Adam Jones.

Benny Boo Boo struck out, but he did catch the final fly ball.  I hope he had a great time.

Major props to Joe Nathan for striking out Ryan Howard in a huge situation.

It was very fitting to have Mariano Rivera easily put the game to rest.

AL wins home field advantage in a game that defense made the difference.  The NL’s lack of in the first doomed them and Carl’s catch saved the AL.

I know the Rays had home field advantage last year and it didn’t make a difference, but the way the weather was in October the more games at the Trop the better.

Congratulations Carl, you’re an MVP around here all the time.  Go Rays!

Once again the Rays front office proved why they make the big bucks, and we just sit in our mom’s basement typing in our pajamas.  Many different names were being thrown around to fill the Rays right field spot, but none of them were Matt Joyce.  I think this is a brilliant move.

I must wish Edwin Jackson well.  He was a big part of the Rays success this year and I hope he knows the fans appreciate his efforts.

Brilliant, I tell ya.  First, they didn’t trade Sonny.  He had me at ALCS.  Not to mention, he rocks when it comes to inter-league play.  It wouldn’t surprise me if he could play right field!

Second, they went with a young guy who has tons of potential.  Matt Joyce totally fits the Rays mold.  He’s going to have no problems fitting in.

Third, he’s super cute.  The genius that is Katie from Those Girls tracks teams based on their baseball abilities and their swoon worthy factor.  I think this trade puts the Rays right off her chart.  Can any other team compare?

So now I wonder what they are thinking for the DH vacancy?  Should we all chip in so they can get Manny Ramirez?  Hopefully they’ll surprise us again.  Please no Abreu or Burrell.  I know, you can show me stats that these guys could really help the Rays, but they still bug me.  Things don’t always have to be logical.  Just like I could care less about Jason Bartlett’s stats.  The fact is when he was playing the Rays won games and I didn’t scream at the TV.  Sometimes you have to go with your gut.

Who’s going to be the odd man out?  Gross is definitely not DH material, so are they just going to decide at Spring Training whether they should keep him around?  Any chance Rocco comes back?  Please Mr. Friedman this is serious.  I named my dog after the guy.

Best wishes to Jonny Gomes.  It was a blast.

One more thing.  I’d like to thank DRaysbay and Rays Index for giving up their lives to keep us informed of all the latest Rays news.  I toast you regularly during the offseason.  Go Rays!!

Brilliant!

An ode to my awesome evening at the Trop…

B oo-yah!  I freakin hate this word, and the fat sweaty guy in my section who kept screaming it, is lucky I didn’t kick him in the back of the head for being the one dark spot on a fantastic evening.

E d-WIN Jackson!  That’s the second time I’ve see him pitch this season, and last time he gave up multiple three run homers.  Thanks Edwin for finding it.  Whatever it may be.

E xciting and electric yet excruciating.  This game was great fun, but I really wish I could be there when they clinch.  Damn it why can’t I inherit a fortune from some long lost relative.

R ays win!  Wouldn’t it be cool if they can get at least 96 wins.  People they lost 96 games last year!

Now that it’s the morning after and I have this dull ache in my brain and I’m way bloated, I think I’ll go a few rounds with the punching bag.  You know who I’m going to visualize?  The Toronto Bluejays.  What is up with them being all awesome when they played the Rays last time, and now they can’t get it together and beat the Red Sox.  C’mon if you can’t do it for the Rays, there is another reason you birds should be winning.  So that the Yankees finish fourth in the AL East.  Get with the program.  Sheesh!

Alright Kazmir, let Balfour give you your mohawk before the game.  Use as a source of awesomeness please.  Go Rays!!

Holy Shitske!

People the Rays won again.  I know right?  Hinske made that web gem.  Edwin pitched seven innings and only gave up one run.  The bullpen gave up a couple of runs, but they still saved the game.  Floyd and Aybar took care of the offense.  This team can play some baseball.  There were 14,000 people there to witness it first hand.

The attendance for this series has been a hot topic.  That’s why I must make a confession.  Besides all of the normal excuses of money, work, etc., there is one other reason Rays fans don’t get out to the games during the week.  Thirsty Thursdays.

Depending how far you want to stretch the Tampa Bay area, there are three to five minor league teams that play here.  So some people, yes I’m guilty, abandon their major league team.  Why?  Because sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came.  It could also have something to do with the dollar beers, and the gulf breeze as you watch outdoor baseball.

This does not mean that I love the Rays any less.  I mean, have you met me?  I just prefer to go to the Trop on the weekends.  Sorry Rays.  Keep up with the whole being awesome thing and I’ll see you this weekend.  Go Rays!!

(photo ESPN)

Wow, a road win!

I think there are times that a position player should get credit for the save.  Last night when I heard Percival was warming up, my reaction was…Uh Oh they better try to get some insurance runs, because one run isn’t going to cut it for Percy.  Not exactly the feeling you should have when your closer comes in.  Thankfully Carlos Pena did add some insurance runs and saved the day.  Rays win 5-2!

Since it was Friday and the game was later, I’m sure I’m not the only one that was tired.  So I was easily distracted.  For instance, the white dot on top of the Royals hats is weird.  I started to wonder if other teams have this and I just haven’t noticed.  It looks a little like a bird came along and you know left a dot of poo on their hats.  Just sayin.

I also found this chick behind home plate distracting, and I’m not even a dude.  She was wearing a tube top.  Well someone should inform women that when they wear strapless shirts to a baseball game that the seat in front of them blocks the view of their actual shirt and they end up looking like they’re sitting there naked.  Nekkid!  This phenomena is increased if the woman has eye catching tan lines.

Oh yeah, I did actually watch the game. 

E-Jax – Was better.  Had a no hitter going thru five?  He gave up two homeruns but they were of the solo variety, instead of the three-run ones he tends to give up. 
Balfour – Is it possible to get too pumped up?  He did fine, was a little wild.  Does it look like he’s calling the batters bad names under his breath?
Howell – Great as usual, even with bases loaded in a one run game.
Wheeler – Also held the Royals at bay.
Percy – Scary again.  He gave up a homerun.  I have no confidence in him.
Aki – Good game, two hits, his normal great play in the field.
BJ – Had a lazy bones play to start off with that really pissed me off.  Once again he didn’t run a ball out.  He thought it was a base hit, but he was very wrong.  Fail.  He doubled later in the game, but I’m still a little pissed.
CC – Has been pretty terrible.  Far cry from when he used to be known as superman.  I hope it’s just a slump, and he turns it on right when we need him to.  Like soon.
Longo – Solid play all around.  Love him.
Pena – Finally broke out a little last night.  He doubled and hit a much needed two run shot in the 9th.  Oh and he’s always a gold glover.
Clifford – Hit a couple of balls hard, but they only made it to the warning track.  One at bat he looked lost and silly.
Navi – Mr. Consistent lived up to his name once again.
Hinske – Had a hit, but still hasn’t been able to turn it on.  No embarrassing plays in right field though.
Barty – Made a couple of great plays in the field.  When he wasn’t getting hit by pitches he actually hit the ball hard, just right to someone.  Still love him though. 

Good win, since it looks like they are all going to be important from here on out.  It’s going to be a battle for the east!  Let’s hope they can get another win tonight.  Go Rays!!!

Hey, Matt Garza here.  I know I look half-baked in that picture there, and my hat is crooked, and it looks like I dipped my chin in chocolate but…I totally just out dueled Roy Halladay.  Why?  Because I can.  My spit don’t stink.  I pitched seven plus innings and they only got two hits. 

Then my boys went to work with all kinds of bunts.  Because turns out it’s really hard to hit Roy’s pitches too.  Carlos finally drove one in thankfully.  Then the kid, E-Lo, who’s like two whole years younger than me, hit his first grand salami!  I bet that chick at Her Rays wishes she could have seen that.  She loves him.  Clifford hit one out later too.  6-0 Rays.  Quite a cushion for the bullpen.  Right?

No.  They damn near imploded.  They needed three outs.  They gave up four runs!  Can I just tell you I would have went bat shit crazy if they would have blown that.  From what I hear they did that a lot last season.  We can’t be having that. 

Anyway let’s get back to talking about me.  I’m really starting to get the hang of this.  I ruled out there tonight.  Someday Minnesota’s going to be talking about how they shouldn’t have let me go, forget that Santana guy.  Don’t worry it’s not cocky it’s confidence.  Anybody would want to pitch better following Shields and Kazmir.  Let’s hope Edwin can keep it going tomorrow.  Go Rays!!

Since the Rays are on the road again, and I am on a road trip, I got to thinking…What would the guys be like on a road trip in a VW microbus?  Besides crowded.

This is what comes to my warped mind.

Kazmir giving Shields a manicure.
Garza hopped up on sour patch kids playing video games.
Sonny picking crumbs out of his beard.
Edwin Jackson reading poetry.
Navi making the bus driver stop at every Dunkin Donuts, so he can get his free donut.
Pena rubbing lotion on…Oops wrong fantasy.
Aki and his interpreter making fun of everyone else in Japanese.
Barty, Hinske, Floyd and Gross playing poker.
Hinske is trying to stack the deck.
Bartlett is using that poker face of his and stealing all their moolah.
Floyd going all in trying to win enough to upgrade his earring.
Gross smiling, just happy to be included, and getting a big hand when he needs it.
Longo twirling his gum and dreaming about the Longo ball.
Crawford assuming the role of the impatient kid.  “Are we there yet?”
BJ is way too cool for all this, so he ignores everyone and listens to his Ipod.
Gomes trying to get everyone fired up with sing a longs.
Percy trying to keep things under control.  “Don’t make me come back there”
I think we all know what Howell would be doing in the back of the van.  What’s that funny smell?
Maddon directing the driver to the next wine tasting.

Sounds like fun, I’m in.  Go Rays!!!

Dang Danks.

The Rays had trouble with Danks and his southpaw again last night.  Sox 5 – Rays 1. 

Jackson just couldn’t keep the ball down, and he paid for it.

Runners were stranded on 3rd at least three times that I remember.  Barty’s base-running in particular was excellent.  I find him excellent on many levels though.

The Rays still played good defense.  BJ gunned down a runner going for a triple.  Really cool.

Jonny Gomes struck out four times.  Four.  Excruciating.

Pena is coming up in a lot of key situations and not getting the job done.  Hope he turns that around tonight.

Maddon keeps messing with the line-up.  Doesn’t he respect the streak?  Don’t ruin their chemistry Joe!

So let’s hope the Rays can get back on track tonight.  Go Rays!!

Oh, all night I was wondering why Nick Swisher kinda creeps me out.  Then I figured it out.  He looks like a ventriloquist doll.  No, I wasn’t smoking crack last night.  Next time you see him you’re going to be like “Oh, my gosh she’s right!”

Not on TV!!!

This is a game I wish I could have seen!  Even if it was a bit like batting practice for the Rays.  What do Staats and Magrane do on these nights?  They wouldn’t want to miss the Commodores.

Evan Longoria is way hotter than Eva.  The fact that I’m not a switch hitter might have something to do with it but…  Evan hit two homeruns tonight.  In the first two innings.  Love him.  He drove in six runs.  Six.  That’s hot!

The super cool BJ Upton went 4 for 4 with two doubles.  Smooth.

Pena was rockin too.  Was he just a homerun shy of the cycle?

Can’t comment on any of the defensive plays, because the freakin game wasn’t on TV!

E. Jackson finally gets a win.  Although he pitched five innings and gave up three runs.  I’m going to venture a guess that he was struggling with control.  I’m not a professional, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

Howell did good in relief once again.

Glover did not good in relief once again.

Reyes finished it.  Oh and the Rays won big.  Baltimore 4 – Tampa 11!

Hope they saved some bat power for a sweep tomorrow!  Go Rays!!