Little Ray Riding Hood

Once upon a time Little Ray’s manager sent him through the field to take some goodies to his sick grandma.  His grandma was his biggest fan, but her health was failing after many losing seasons.  His manager warned him not to stray from the base path.  He also made sure he wore his hoody with the new logo.

So Little Ray set off down the path.  Everything was fine except he noticed some Blue Jays and Orioles trailing him, and as he was rounding the second corner he saw a Big Bad Yankee just off the path.  Little Ray knew that the Big Bad Yankee is historically a formidable enemy, but in May he looked like he meant no harm.

The Big Bad Yankee asked what was in the basket.  Little Ray told him that it was something to make his Grandma feel better.  The Big Bad Yankee’s ears perked up since he was always looking for prospects.  He tried to get Little Ray to take a short cut, but Little Ray knew that he just had to take the third turn and then he could slide on into Grandma’s home.

The Big Bad Yankee waited for Little Ray to leave and then headed across the diamond toward Grandma’s home.  When he got there he pulled Grandma’s hammy, locked her in a closet, and threatened to force Carl Pavano on Little Ray if she made a sound.

Meanwhile as Little Ray was taking the third turn he saw a man in Red Sox.  He immediately started to run.  The man in Red Sox yelled after him “What’s your hurry?”  Little Ray’s manager had warned him about this.  “No lead is too big for you” he yelled as he ran into Grandma’s home.

He took the basket over to where Grandma was lying in bed.  Grandma looked strange to Little Ray.  “What strong arms you have Grandma?”  “The better to hold you with my dear” said Grandma.     ”What good gloves you have Grandma?”  “The better to play catch with you my dear” said Grandma.  Little Ray still looked suspicious.  “What a big bat you have Grandma?”  The Big Bad Yankee threw off his disguise, showed his teeth and said “The better to beat you with!”

Little Ray didn’t want to lose, but he didn’t know what to do.  When suddenly his favorite superhero Carl Crawford swooped in to save the day.  Carl spun around that Big Bad Yankee wicked fast until he was super dizzy.  Then Jonny Gomes stole the show and finished him off.

When the chalk settled the Big Bad Yankee had been defeated, but Little Ray still feared the worst for Grandma.  They looked around the room, there was no sign of her.   Then they heard a noise coming from the closet.  It was a cowbell.  “It’s Grandma”  Jonny broke the door down and they brought Grandma to her bed.

“Grandma you have to be alright.  We beat the Big Bad Yankee”  said Little Ray
Grandma’s voice was very weak.  “What was the score?”
“7 to 1″ said Little Ray confidently.

Grandma’s color started to come back. 
“But Grandma there’s more.  I have to show you what we have in our basket now.”
“First we have some really good starting pitching.  Then we have amazing defense.  And to top it off a legitimate bullpen.” said Little Ray
“It sounds too good to be true” said Grandma
“I know” said Little Ray “but there’s hope”